


Not a Love Song

by caplanbuckybarnes



Category: Marvel
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Mentions of Cancer, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:13:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24865126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caplanbuckybarnes/pseuds/caplanbuckybarnes
Summary: Not all love stories have a happy ending.Based off the song "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Not a Love Song

**Heart beats fast  
**

**Colours and promises**

**How to be brave?**

**How can I love when I’m afraid to fall?**

“Hi,” a voice to your left greeted, startling you ever so slightly. “My name is Steve Rogers.” You squinted at the name before a memory clicked in your head. “We met at your cousin’s wedding back in April.”

“Oh, right!” you chuckled, holding a hand out as you balanced the box full of soap in the other before it toppled to the floor.

“My apologies,” Steve leaned down to help you pick up the soap that fell on the floor. “Your cousin said you’d be working today, I hope I’m not intruding.”

“Of course not,” you smiled at the sweet memory of talking to this man all night had appeared in your mind. “What can I do for you?”

“I’ve been thinking about something lately,” his lopsided smile pulled at your heart and you felt weak in the knees at the sight. “Can I get to know you a little better? One night with you wasn’t enough. I talked to your cousin, she approves of us.”

Chuckling, you shook your head. Of course your cousin would meddle in your love life. You’d only been complaining for the last few months that you were tired of being the single friend in all of your friend groups. “Of course, I’d love to see you again, Steve.”

**But watching you stand alone**

**All of my doubt**

**Suddenly goes away somehow**

**One step closer**

You’d spent nearly every night for the next two weeks going on dates with Steve, getting to know one another, becoming fast friends and soon enough, you had your first kiss with Steve. Soon after that, you invited him into your house for the night. ANd the next, the next, the day after. Quickly the man moved in with you. 

**I have died every day waiting for you**

**Darling, don’t be afraid**

**I have loved you for a thousand years**

**I’ll love you for a thousand more**

Your relationship with STeve grew fast, along with your feelings for the man. Pretty soon, you knew you were ready to tell him you’d loved him for the first time. You were in the kitchen, watching him cooking breakfast for the pair of you, the small kitten you’d adopted a few weeks ago climbing all over your lap.

“I can feel you staring at me,” he spoke softly, peering over his shoulder to get a good look at you. “You looking at my ass muscles again?” You giggled as he flexed his cheeks in his sweatpants.

“How can I not?” you teased. “Your ass looked so edible.”

He chuckled before returning to the food. 

“Steve?” you asked after a moment. You don’t know why you were so nervous. He hummed in response. “I think I’m in love with you.”

You could see the smile on his face before he turned around to face you. “I’ve been waiting to hear you say those words; I’ve been in love with you for weeks. But I wanted you to be ready to say them as well before I mentioned it.”

“You’re a jerk,” you playfully threw a dishrag at him, causing the kitten to become startled and run off your lap.

**Time stands still**

**Beauty in all she is**

**I will be brave**

**I will not let anything take away**

**What’s standing in front of me**

**Every breath**

**Every hour has come to this**

You’d spent five long years with Steven Grant Rogers. You’d started noticing he was withdrawing from you. He wasn’t eating as much as he used to. He claimed he wasn’t hungry all the time. He was losing hair in odd places. He was becoming all skin and bones when once upon a time, he was thick with broad muscle. 

You’d ask him time and time again if he was depressed, if he was going through a rough time. But he always shot you down with that bright smile of his. The smile that was burned into your memory now. The smile that was becoming less and less frequent.

Ten years had passed since you married the man of your dreams. Ten, beautiful years along with a son and daughter. You’d met many of his friends and people he considered his family.

**One step closer**

**I have died every day waiting for you**

**Darling, don’t be afraid**

**I have loved you for a thousand years**

**I’ll love you for a thousand more**

**And all along I believed I would find you**

**Time has brought your heart to me**

**I have loved you for a thousand years**

**I’ll love you for a thousand more**

**One step closer**

**One step closer**

All of those people he’d introduced you to over the years, all of your friends and family stuck by you. Even after the long talk he’d held with you one starry Tuesday night. He’d taken you on a walk down the beach barefoot. He knew it was your favorite to be. He knew you loved feeling the sand between your toes and the scent of salty air.

**I have died every day waiting for you**

**Darling, don’t be afraid**

**I have loved you for a thousand years**

**I’ll love you for a thousand more**

The beach is where he confessed that he’d been suffering with cancer– lung cancer. He thought he was getting better, the test results for his doctors said so. But the doctors lied, or maybe they had misread a diagnosis. Steve was still sickly. You had been woken up to a horrible sound coming from the bathroom down the hall; he’d been puking again.

**And all along I believed I would find you**

**Time has brought your heart to me**

**I have loved you for a thousand years**

**I’ll love you for a thousand more**

Soon after the puking started up again, you knew his time was up. You knew he was at the end of his days. The chemo wasn’t helping him. The radiation was making him even more sickly. But the cancer had spread too far too fast for the doctors to take control. He died in your arms that night, 1:06am. 

Your whole body shook as you walked into the funeral home to see your beloved man laying atop white cushions in the casket. The tears came soon after. You hardly registered anyone else, even after you’d been pulled away from the casket to be seated.


End file.
